Inspired...

There are plenty of mornings that before my feet touch the ground I am planning my day. I am the most productive planner ever. However, I am not the biggest achiever when it comes to the follow through. I can write lists, I can day dream of completed projects, inside, outside and crafty wise. Oh, you want to know how to plan? I can help. Now, can someone help me with follow through?

Well I can't say that today was a total waste... I did get my morning work out in. I went to School, I did some things in the office, I made a smoothie, cleaned the kitchen and did my home work. I must admit with my big brown eyes that I didn't complete the outside projects that I had hoped to cross of my list nor the three loads of unforgiving laundry that keep accumulating in my basement.

Well, if I didn't do everything that was on my list, what did I do instead? I do believe that it is a great feeling to be productive and get the to-do's crossed off the lists that never stop growing; I also love to be inspired. Yes, that is right. Sometimes we need a day to look into things that inspire us; be it recipes, projects, pre planning to my planning. Today I made a new folder and I labeled it "To Do Recipes" and in this folder are recipes such as; Oatmeal Crumble Muffins, Mexican Rice, Cinnamon Toast Rolls and Almond -Crusted Chicken with Roasted Red Pepper Sauce. All recipes I stumbled upon while blog surfing. I am excited to try them. Just in time for camping.

I am always on the look out for new recipes and inventive ideas when it comes to anything domestic. The day isn't over yet, so maybe another 45 minutes on the hunt for more inspiration and then I must get another work out in and finish cleaning oh and why I suppose I had better start some laundry even if I don't fold it until tomorrow. Sometimes I wish I lived next door to Winnie The Pooh and could just respond to the laundry with an "Oh bother" and leave it for someone else to do.

Today has been a great day. Hope yours has been too.

Live your best life,
Mistie

Another day, a new chance, a new month, a new chapter...

Good Morning World AKA my oyster,

Today's blog will feature my will to live with purpose. : ) I have a little over one year left of School and possibly will be my last Summer totally free. What to do? What to do? Well, I can't just lay around in the sun all Summer, taking trips to the lake and watching soaps. While this would be fun, it also would be a little unfulfilled. So, I need to make good use of my time and energy and it starts today.

I haven't been in the right mind set about losing weight at all and frankly I need a mental break from even thinking about it. So, I think the break has been long enough and I truly feel ready to tackle the challenge before me and give it another shot at continuing my weight loss journey. So today I started with an hour on my bike and I will do another hour of cardio after I get back from School.

I also will try to keep active, there are plenty of things I want and need to accomplish around my house. We have a huge yard project that we are starting and there is a million and one things to do outside. If the weather permits, I will be getting the earth ready for my flowers.

I have decided I need to pay it forward more. Once a week, I want to make an attempt to pay it forward, do something nice for somebody, even if it's just putting a smile on their face. : ) Sometimes helping others is the most fulfilling thing we can do. Sure, it would be nice to have a million dollars and to play secret santa, but that isn't the case, right now, so I have to use the resources that God gave me. My time and the things that I do have.

I want to reinvent myself, my life and live with purpose... going day to day is not full filling me and here all this time I thought, well if I didn't work, I could do more things like that. Wrong - none of the things I had daydreamed of are actually happening. We have to take what we have, at that moment and do something for the greater of the good for someone else. No more excuses.

Today, the name I picked out of the hat was Justin Shogren. While it's his birthday today, I already will be going over, I've decided (cuz he is a funny kind of guy) that I would go to the store and buy the best looking steak there is and wrap it up as a birthday present : ) - So not sure that it counts, since I was going to do that anyways, but I am going to stick with that.

Today, I am going to plan a 7 day menu, pick up the office, do some laundry, work on my math, work out in the yard, get another hour of cardio in and stop by the store. Once all these things are done, I am going to work on making some cards and then possibly send a few people.

Well I must run, I have so much more to say..... but maybe later!

Purpose

I am hearing allot of talk about living life on purpose, with a purpose and having a passion for your purpose. The only thing I can think of right now that I would be passionate about is, being a Mom. I truly feel like I was destined to be a Mom. It's like I am not willing to accept the fact that I may not be a Mom. I won't accept it and I need to never give up on the dream of becoming one.

It makes me sad to not have a family. I don't talk about it allot but deep down inside to my core it really effects me. Some days more than others. It is all I have ever dreamed of since I was a little girl playing house "being the bossy Mamma" I truly feel like I don't have a family and the family that I do have, I don't feel like I belong. I feel so displaced sometimes and I just want to create my own family, I want three children. Two boys and a girl ok, two girls and a boy would be pretty awesome too.

I am so thankful for my husband and Mom. They feel like the only family I have. I really need to focus now on losing the rest of my weight. I don't know why I am holding myself back but I have got to push through, if losing weight is my only chance at getting pregnant than I have a big emotional hill to climb but the outcome will be great. I want children more than anything in life.

I need to have this be my anchor. I need to think of this and strive and believe that this will come true... The hole in my heart is so large and while I try to fill it with other things, it never works. If you are reading this, please keep me in your prayers to be a Mom.

Thanks!

Spring Break

Well it sounds funner than it actually is. Although, I can't lie and say that I haven't enjoyed sleeping in and doing whatever I've wanted to, because the truth is... I have loved every minute of it. I guess the thing I love the most is not having stress. It feels good to be stress free. Like any other goal oriented American, or maybe it's just what I do; I made a chore list of everything that I wanted to accomplish this week. However, it started out a Spring Cleaning list and ended up being a Summer list; meaning that I put far to many things on there to be done in one week.

So, today I am going to organize my sewing room. I have taken up a new craft; making cards. I love to send cards so why not make them. Of course, they are very generic, plain and boring. Just waiting to go to a stamping up class to learn how to make the cool ones. I am a total card. : ) heheh Love getting cards and love sending them as well.

I got up at 5:30 this morning and walked with Robin and then came home and biked for 20 minutes. Boy I feel out of shape. I need to kick it into high gear. Next week, I want to bike for an hour a day. Hopefully my legs can keep up. They get tired fast on a bike. That's OK, I worked up a great sweat. I know one of these days it's all going to click. The food, the work outs, the desire and focus to lose weight and I will start losing again. Until then; no panic, no stressy, no worry - just love and accept myself right where I am at. : )

Be present in the moment. Don't escape it.

Well I suppose I better get busy if I want to be productive. I want to clean the bathroom and do the kitchen floor today too. I am not gonna lie, laying on the couch watching chick flicks while I cross stitch sounds so much more appealing.

Hope whoever is reading this is having a wonderful day.

Career Change!

Well I am going to get in and see my counselor asap and see how soon I can switch my course. I have decided that I am going to change course and go to school to get my medical receptionist degree/certificate. I wont have pre-reqs done in enough time to do the Dental Assisting and in the chance the PTA program does not accept me, I can hopefully switch my classes immediately and be done by Dec 2012, and still have 5 months of unemployment to look for work. Say prayers that this all falls in line... : ) He is guiding my steps, I am just following.

---M.

Running away from yourself

Those words hit home with me when I heard Bob Harper tell Rosie O' D that on her show. Rosie was talking about how she hated her body and couldn't look at herself and Bob brought up such a good point and said, you can't be like that, because it will make you want to run away from yourself. Instead you need get naked, stand in front of the mirror and embrace yourself, love yourself right where you are at.

When we run from ourselves, we turn to, all sorts of things except ourselves and it only adds to further disappointment. It was an Ah Hah moment for me. I do that allot... I turn to food to run from myself... I find myself so stressed out lately with school that I have really turned to food for comfort and soothing. I am working out just not to gain weight and it's driving me crazy.

So today, I choose a different approach. I think I made up my mind that school is just not for me. I will finish out this year, and apply for the PTA program and then look for a job, and hopefully get a decent job. I feel more peace today about that decision... I am calm and just led by my heart. I will of course pray and take inventory of my emotions, situation, goals, etc., in the months to come but this is the direction that I am going.

My approach is to embrace myself. I am OK with who I am, where I am and I love myself right where I am. No more running, no more desperate attempts to have to lose all my weight overnight. It's holding me back and stressing out me out. So, I will make healthier choices and maybe set a goal to lose 1 lb. a week for right now and in a month or so, check in and see where I am at.

Losing weight is more than just sticking to a diet and working out; it is 90% emotional for me. I am really great at beating myself up while loving everyone else, and giving everyone else I love bounds of grace but for some odd reason, never extending that to myself, nor loving myself the way that I need to be loved. I feel in such a good place today. The stress of school is over, the stress of have to lose all my weight right now is over, the stress of being mad at myself for school and not losing weight is over.

Today, I have peace. I close my eyes and just embrace this moment and am thankful for it and all my blessings and the strength to carry on and to live to fight another day. I am not under the gun in any manner. I got to clean my house and start a craft project while drinking tea and having a cookie and it was nice. It was just what the doctor ordered.

I have a million creative ideas running through my head and all these crafts and projects I wanna start. I also want this Summer to be active; swimming, tennis, hikes, biking etc., I want to have a fantastic active summer. I want to work in my yard and make it cute, I want to grow a garden. I have some Easter projects I wanna make.

Tomorrow I am going to make Easter cookies and deliver to my loved ones to put a smile on their face. I cannot tell you enough how badly, I just want a job instead of going to school. I have never wanted a normal schedule with no pressure, stress, deadlines from four different classes all at once and make sure you memorize everything too.

Today I give myself the gift of peace and with that, I smile and soak up the rest that comes along with that. My mind is restful and there is a balance right now today.

Never run away from yourself, run towards yourself, you are worth it. We all are.

I think I almost did lose my mind.

Dear Blog,

               I have missed you! It feels incredibly great to have spare time to write again. I even posted a food blog this morning, it was nothing fancy, yet it's still something that I love to do. I never knew that I require ME time to be happy? I am not complaining but the last sixty days have pushed me, stretched me and pulled me beyond my breaking limits. Those people that warned me about Anatomy and Physiology were not kidding when they said, "Say goodbye to your social life, free time, you time, any time!"

They weren't joking.

This was me this FALL 2011 quarter

              Then I started Winter 2012 Quarter.

I learned more than 213 bones, grooves, fissures, muscles, reflexes, nerves, etc., Not to mention how all that works. I also learned that I don't have the coping tools to deal with stress. I don't think that I have ever had a more challenging task in my life, than finishing the AP course. Thank God for my exercise regiment or else I would probably be up 20 pounds. I found myself becoming overwhelmed with life, laundry and lessons. I thought I saw a light at the end of the tunnel but I was wrong. It was a train.

This was me this quarter

             I know what you're thinking and you're right, I am not normally a negative person, I am chipper, upbeat and most of the time so darn happy I drive people nuts but this course took me down a 100 paces. There are no words that can articulate the experience that not only I had to endure but my lovely classmates as well. I was told before going into the class that people fail, people walk away, people start drinking (raises hand).

Sending out an SOS!

            There is good news after all, and well I guess I should make this the turn around where I become positive again. I didn't fail this class, nor walk away and as a matter of fact I have a 89% in the class. This old lady who never went to high school had to work very hard for that grade. I also had two other classes. English was reading and writing intensive and math. While I love English, I was sad to say that I couldn't dedicate nearly as much time as I had hoped and would of loved to. I wasn't able to focus and study on math like I should of either, I hate math anyway. So that wasn't a heartbreak like the English was.

Boy oh boy, it was a roller coaster ride and with the exception of one last final, it is over. If I could spell hal a luya I would. But I can't, so you get the picture.

           Spring break is approaching and I am excited to get my house back in order. Start the new season off with a less stressful schedule and get back to eating right, working out, drinking my water, planting flowers, sewing, making new recipes, blogging, cleaning, girls day's, pedicures (my poor tootsies), craft days, new projects. I am ready to get ME back. I am ready to get my social life back and start living life a little bit more. Although, I will still be in school, it will be a walk in the park compared to last quarter.

           I want to start blogging again on a weekly basis and get my peace back! I am ready for peace. : ) Start loving life again. That's what Mistie is about; life and living every moment the best she can.

I bid you a good farewell until we meet again,

(ME)

Happy again!

IT'S OVER & I DID IT!